1000 questions2 min read

here we are. its been 1000 posts here @ pieceoplastic.com.
so here’s a silly test for a silly blog.
[damn, i almost forgot i had this test that i had seen here quite awhile ago]
well, i figure, if you still reading this ridiculous blog you deserve to know what a naughty and perverted punkass bitch mofo i am, no?

( ) i never have been drunk
( ) i never have smoked pot
( ) i never have kissed a member of the opposite sex
( ) i never have kissed a member of the same sex
(x) i never crashed a friend’s car [i have no friends, so…]
(x) i never have been to japan [this is high on my to-do list]
( ) i never rode in a taxi
(x) i never had anal sex [its so unhip to admit this]
(x) i never enjoyed it [yeah and how could i enjoy it if i never did it]
( ) i never have been in love
( ) i never had sex
( ) i never have had sex in public
( ) i never have been dumped
( ) i never shoplifted
( ) i never have been fired
( ) i never have been in a fist fight
( ) i never had a threesome
( ) i never snuck out of my parents’ house
( ) i never have been tied up (sexually)
( ) i never have been caught masturbating
( ) i never pissed on myself
( ) i never had sex with a member of the same sex
( ) i never have been arrested
( ) i never made out with a stranger
( ) i never stole something from my job
(x) i never celebrated new years in time square [and why would i?]
( ) i never went on a blind date
( ) i never lied to a friend
( ) i never had a crush on a teacher
(x) i never celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans [god no!]
( ) i never been to Europe [???]
( ) i never skipped school
( ) i never slept with a co-worker
( ) i never cut myself on purpose
( ) i never had sex at the office
( ) i never got married
( ) i never got divorced
(x) i never had children [i guess abortions dont count.. err]

and may i add some interweb rites of passages:

( ) i never have opened a spam email
( ) i never have dated anyone i met online
( ) i never had cybersex with a stranger [who for all i know prolly was a 50 year old, fat, sweaty office clerk]
( ) i never have subscribed to a porn site
( ) i never have sold anything via ebay
( ) i never have downloaded mp3s via p2p
( ) i never have downloaded and used cracked software
( ) i never have downloaded an entire movie
( ) i never have posted 1000 entries to a blog

2 Replies to “1000 questions2 min read

  1. (x) you found the plural to “moose” and never cease to amaze missie w. tod

    C O N G R A T S!!!1!!!1!

    (i’m not sure about our arrival time in fribourg yet – i’ll sms/call/morse you tomorrow!)

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