dave berry’s newest column describes just how california was able to take the title “dufus state” away from florida. hilarious!
“Under California election law, virtually anybody can run for governor, except of course smokers. Porn King Larry Flynt has courageously thrown his hat into the ring, despite the very real risk that he will draw attention to himself. (Larry’s hat is still in the ring; nobody wants to pick it up, because who knows where that thing has been?)
Also on the ballot are Arnold Schwarzenegger (who has promised to straighten California out by, quote, ‘Not making any more movies”); Arianna Huffington, former wife of former congressperson Michael Huffington; the Huffingtons’ former cat, Puffington Huffington; Demi Moore; her cute new boyfriend; the Oakland Raiders; the late Bob Hope; and Harold R. Wankmilker, a resident of Nevada who accidentally got on the ballot when he attempted to pay a California speeding ticket by mail.”