or: more thoughts on being an ex-dj…
a big part of wil wheaton‘s book just a geek is about him being a has-been actor. or not.
reading it makes me think alot about my own situation as an ex-dj. totally different in lots of ways, different scale, different ballgame, but still there is a surprising amount of parallels. yesterday i wrote some stuff about it here, but there are two more aspects i forgot:
vultures
what do you call people, who used to know you when you were a locally sucessful and semi-famous dj, but dont know you any longer after you quit? vultures is not too harsh a term for them, or is it? its probably nothing compared to what other, much more succesful and famous people have to go through, but still, even on this small and totally local scale it happens. and it hurts.
actually it hurts just a little, because the hurt is more a feeling of hurt pride and it mixes well with anger. a very rightous anger, that is. but it still sucks… when i go to parties i never know who is still greeting me. i never get invited to the insider-events anymore. and some people are simply at a loss when they see me, they dont understand how they should deal with me.
i always thought dj’s have become highly overrated over the last decade or so. what originally drew me to the dj-culture was precicely the absense of such a star-cult. the people dancing were what made the party. the dj was just one of us selecting and mixing the records. so when i was a dj i always down-played my importance. i never participated in the celebration of the dj-cult. i tried to always treat people with humilty and without arrogance. i cant deny, that it did feel good when some of “my” clubnights started to go well [mouthwatering, electro_shox]. but it was for the parties i was proud of, maybe the concept behind them. not for me as a dj. my role as a dj was just a small part that.
all the more it came as a shock to me to realise that certain people had been interested in knowing me, because i was a semi-famous dj. and now no longer…
tinnitus
health is a much bigger issue, but one i cant really write about here yet. maybe later…
just some thoughts about tinnitus. yeah, i got it. its not bad tinnitus. i refer to it à la de la soul as d.a.i.s.y. [da inner sound yall]. when i was 16 i already had tinitus once. after a few teenage angsted months i had learned how to deal with the ringing in my inner ear. just let it ring.
but its gotten much worth through djing. now i have this problem with focusing my hearing. i cant concentrate on smaller sounds. gentle sounds disspear for me as soon as a louder sound is present. i used to able to filter out certain sounds out by concentrating on others. this is no longer possible. the loudest sound supresses all. i notice this often when we watch tv with my wife. she hears things much clearer.
its not often talked about but i actually think this could become quite a problem. most dj’s and club technicians i know have hearing problems. and they are the one’s setting the volume in clubs. the louder they go, the more shot their ears become, the yet louder they will go next time. soon clubbers will have the same problems. quite a few years ago i noticed in london how the level of volume in clubs had gone unbelievably high. i had to actually leave a few clubs because it was too loud. and how uncool is that, huh…
clubbing is almost out of the question for me these days. one reason is that it bores the living crap out of me. i used to always participate in “making” the party. either as a dj or as an organiser. but its also because of my tinnitus and other health issues that i cant do it. the post-party earringing swaping over longer and longer into the next week. nah…